I am on a train now to Haridwar. I will post pics later. I left the Sri Aurobindo Ashram on friday the 22nd at about 2:00pm. I will tell you more about the Sri Aurobindo Ashram in a proceeding post and more about my time there. For now lets just say that it was ethereal and very humbling.
I decided to spend a night in paharganj. How different Paharganj was from the Ashram. Paharganj is a neighbourhood in Delhi alive with noise, colour, traffic, animals, locals, tourists and indian goods from all over the sub-continent. I booked a room for the evening at the Anand hotel for Rs250. I have slept in better rooms before and my first response was "I want to go back to the Ashram. I should have listened to Dr Bijlani." My next thought was that to many in India it would be considered a great comfort to sleep in a bed with running water and a toilet. So i decided to stick it out. :(
There was a wedding ceremony last night. The drummers came out into the street, follwed by the bride and her parade. People joined in dancing and singing. It was so beautiful to see in the middle of Paharganj. Last night i went to purchase a t-shirt to wear in the heat. The shopkeeper, a seemingly religious man (he had a prayer shrine in his shop like most Indians) went out of his way to assist me. He was kind and did not charge more than expected. (i payed 35 rupees for the T-Shirt) I kept thanking him profusely and he kept shaking his head, unaffected by my gratitude, saying: "I am only doing my duty sahib."I am only doing my duty. I am only doing my duty: these words i have been reflecting on since yesterday. Another mystery. Another secret to mystical India slowly being unfolded. Indians are dutiful people. They give full attention to the task with no care for the reward. "politeness" and "niceness" does not work here if there is no depth or substance behind it. These are cheap and fickle expressions with no weight on the soul. In the western world we thrill ourselves with being 'nice' to people. A friendly smile, inspite, a kind gesture and immediately we feel like we deserve a medal or at least a pat on the back. Superficial, shallow attempts at real connection.
The average indian is deeply devoted and committed and pays no attention to lip service or superficial offerings. If you had to ask one of these he would say: "It does not matter to me that you are comfortable or whether you are smiling or not. It does not matter to me how many "good" deeds you have done for the day. If you are in a position to do something then it is your duty to act. Justice demands this!!! We are all an integral part of the whole. What is good for the hive is always good for the bee and NOT the other way around. Dont sit there and expect an applause everytime you get up and do something. This is your duty."
I keep asking myself: what does it mean to be human? Am i so immersed in my self preservation that i forget i am a part of the bigger picture? The irony is that in these efforts to make it on our own and gather for ourselves we die sooner. In India, I am learning that the longer one holds on to the vain illusion of 'I', 'Me', 'Mine', 'Vishalins', the greater the difficulty one faces. The more the struggle intensifies. It is best, here, to leave behind these notions. These expressions of selfishness and lower ego and to quickly submit to the land, to the culture, to the dirty streets, to the crowded busses and trains, to the sweat in the summer heat, to the burst of rain in the streets, to the dancing, to the singing, to the noise and the chaos.
This is part of the beauty i am experiencing here. India's ability to unmask you, allow you to see divinity in all, even in the dirt and also in you. If one misses this. One misses a lot.
